I'm frozen with indecision.
I've read. I've contemplated. I've debated. I've watched related shows. I've even got the email address of someone to interview. I've got everything I need in order to research this subculture, so I go back and read what I've tried to write so far, and I hate it.
Every word.
I can hear the 'trying' - if that makes any sense. It sounds fake.
I don't trust that I'm smart enough to pull this off.
I'm afraid I will do it 'wrong.'
I'm petrified I'll write it and it will suck, and I will have wasted all that time on something I can't use.
I've become focused on what might sell, and not on what I WANT to write.
So I'm screeching to a halt, and taking stock of what I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY want to write...Not what I think will sell...Because obviously, I'm just not wired that way.
Must. Rethink.
Must. Regroup.
I'll let you know when I get it figured out.
I've read. I've contemplated. I've debated. I've watched related shows. I've even got the email address of someone to interview. I've got everything I need in order to research this subculture, so I go back and read what I've tried to write so far, and I hate it.
Every word.
I can hear the 'trying' - if that makes any sense. It sounds fake.
I don't trust that I'm smart enough to pull this off.
I'm afraid I will do it 'wrong.'
I'm petrified I'll write it and it will suck, and I will have wasted all that time on something I can't use.
I've become focused on what might sell, and not on what I WANT to write.
So I'm screeching to a halt, and taking stock of what I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY want to write...Not what I think will sell...Because obviously, I'm just not wired that way.
Must. Rethink.
Must. Regroup.
I'll let you know when I get it figured out.
Usually when I'm going through those feelings, it means it's just not the right TIME for this to happen. Hold on to it, you'll come back to it when you're ready.
ReplyDeleteGo with your gut.